A bear walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bar tender says we do not serve you kind. The bear gets mad and and slams the bar and says now or else. So the bar tender pulls out a gun and shoots the bears hand. (I know crazy time) So the bear bailed out to save his life!

But the bear comes back 4 months later with two six shooters on either side. He walks into the bar slowly KICKING the swinging doors open and says……….

I CAM FOR THE MAN WHO SHOT MY PAW

just saying

You are in plane and next to u, have an annoying person who all time talks to u…

What do u do??????

Simple!

Take out your laptop, open slowly the monitor so the person next to u can see it… and Click here

1. Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
2. I’m not into working out. My philosophy is no pain, no pain.
3. I’m in shape. Round is a shape.
4. I’m desperately trying to figure out why Kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
5. Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
6. I’ve always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific.
7. Ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?
8. Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
9. You have to stay in shape. My mother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 now and we have no idea where she is.
10. I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.
11. One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
12. They show you how detergents take out bloodstains. I think if you’ve got a T-shirt with bloodstains all over it, maybe your laundry isn’t your biggest problem.
13. A lady came up to me on the street, pointed at my suede jacket and said, “Don’t you know a cow was murdered for that jacket?” I said, “I didn’t know there were any witnesses. Now I’ll have to kill you too”.

If someone is sitting next to you on a plane and looks at you constantly or irritates you, do this:

1. Silently and quietly open your laptop ;
2. Switch it on;
3. Make sure the guy/girl is looking at your screen;
4. Close your eyes and look up in the air, saying repeatedly: “Alah Akbahr, Alah Akbahr”;
5. Then click on: http://www.charlesyarbrough.com/i/countdown.swf